Work-horse type deck, and hard work

So yeah, as I may or may not have mentioned here before, the plain-old RWS has never really been my thing. My first ever deck was the Universal Waite, and although it was quite useful in teaching me the basics of the system, I had quite a few issues with the imagery. I gave it away as soon as I procured my second deck and never really looked back. Until quite recently, that is. Things coming full-circle I suppose. The PCS Commemorative seemed like such a nice take on the deck - not too yellow, nicely aged-looking, great extras in the kit - that eventually I couldn't resist. This week I decided to finally take the plunge and work with it.

So far, I am finding it not unlike this card, which I drew early this morning. A work-horse of a deck. Nothing super special, no incredibly deep connection or intense plumbing of my sub-conscious but...clear, concise readings that really get the point across very well. A certain bluntness that I rather appreciate. There's no long staring into the details of the cards here...the answer is there. I can see why a lot of people seem to see the 'classic' decks like RWS as best for reading for others.

But yeah, I've done 3-4 readings for myself, and they have been spot and and to the point and very useful, overall. The cardstock, while definitely not the best of all my decks, is definitely nice by contemporary USG standards; it has a waxy feel I quite enjoy. I definitely like the colors, and the art style in general - it definitely works much better for me than the Universal Waite ever could. Looking forward to the rest of my week with the deck. To me, worth the purchase, especially with very nice Pamela Coleman Smith extras that come with.

As for the actual draw: had an exam today, which I actually just got done with. I suppose, even when in the grand scheme of things the stakes aren't all that high, there is always some apprehension for me with exams. The perfectionist in me or whatnot. This card reminds me that I already have been doing everything I really could be - working hard in class, studying outside of it, writing and re-writing vocabulary to try to memorize, really TRYING and doing the WORK necessary to learn; that's really the best I can do. If it pays off and I do well on the exam, great. If I do a bit less well (and with the work I've done, I don't really think FAILURE is really likely) well, then at least I'll know what I need to focus on in the coming weeks. The goal is not numbers on a piece of paper but rather knowledge in my head. Keeping at it in terms of doing the actual work will get me there, eventually.

"fake it till you make it" / personal responsibility

So one last daily draw to type up before I switch off decks again. This one is really from yesterday, but it's been bouncing around in my head since I saw the cards so figured it was the one worth writing about.

We have here a rather interesting juxtaposition of the Page of Wands and the Three of Swords. We have in the first a youth, putting himself out there, innocent, inexperienced but confident in his abilities - at least enough so to want to prove himself, to gain external validation; and indeed, a rather impressive young lad he is. In the other card we have a woman, older, worn down by life, suffering. Crying with grief or frustration or just plain for-no-particular-reason sadness. What strikes me here is both the isolation - the way she seems to be hiding deliberately behind a cliff so that no one will witness her pain - and the dog, a loyal companion, a constant source of comfort even in the most difficult times.

Put together, these two cards paint a picture I find especially familiar. Thinking about the draw, it also helps me realize better the real source of some of my current frustrations, not-too-serious though they may be. In particular, I find myself recently getting inordinately annoyed hearing a few particular people make excuses, again and again, for their own poor behavior or failure to fulfill certain responsibilities. To me, there are explanations, which may or may not be relevant and even worth getting into, but very rarely do those truly amount to being excuses. This is a pretty well understood idea, but it doesn't in and of itself explain why I get so EMOTIONALLY frustrated in such situations, especially when the excuses weren't even directed (or directly effecting) ME.

Looking at these cards though, I see a lot of myself and how I tend (and try) to operate in them. To me, the things you must do are a long list, and whether you consciously realize it or not, you do prioritize them. Although I definitely do have an ongoing issue (that I AM trying to work on, if to very varying degrees of success) with not getting many of them done... the ones I have the most trouble with are the ones that, for whatever reason, de-facto aren't the highest priority. The things I really prioritize - doing all my schoolwork, getting reading and assignments done, showing up and performing adequately at any job I may have, paying my bills on time, etc - those DO get done, regardless of difficulties I may be having. And even though I don't like to get into too much detail here...sometimes difficulties can feel...very intense and difficult indeed.

Sometimes these two cards are exactly how I feel. Inside despair, frustration, perhaps physical pain I am trying to ignore, hopelessness. Outside I smile and go about my day trying to get the things I NEED to get done, trying not to seem like a downer because its not fair to other people to take out my personal issues on them, or on our interactions. I remember once, years ago, literally having to leave a class to go to the restroom, have some kind of anxiety/panic attack for a few minutes, then returning and quite normally participating actively in an intellectual/academic discussion on the subject matter, as if nothing was wrong at all. And so on and so forth. Sometimes, or often, you may not FEEL like acting like the page at all and yet...there it is in front of you, the need to do so, to at least try...

And in my experience, I guess, regardless of how busy, hungry, sleep-deprived, or distressed you are...the top two or three important things, your strongest priorities CAN get done, if you are determined enough. Which is why I don't like making excuses for myself - if I didn't get something done, regardless of the circumstances, at a fundamental level, it wasn't the highest priority for me. I could have prioritized it better, organized my actions differently, and I didn't, and that is MY responsibility. The best I can do is to sincerely apologize and politely ask for generosity/patience of whoever my unfulfilled obligation was with. Hearing others do otherwise...

But of course, judging other people is a pointless exercise that can only contribute to your own inner negativity. Enough things in my own life and actions to get upset about, no need to add others to that if I don't need to. So going to work on letting go of those unnecessary feelings, and focusing instead on being more responsible in my own life with getting things done.

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These weeks with the Victorian Romantic have been GREAT, I must say. The deck has lovely cardstock that's a true pleasure to shuffle, and the readings I've been getting have been quite awesomely deep. There's so much to plumb in the rich imagery of this deck. Looking forward to working with it again in the future!

A Deck of Quirky Courts

So I tend to try to stick to writing here about the decks that I am actually currently working with, but now and then...an exception.

I decided to take advantage of my access to a scanner here to get my de la rea deck on my computer for future such blogging purposes, and was reminded again why this is one of my favorite decks. It's on odd one, to be sure: offbeat art style, very Marseille based but everything is masks, pip minors with odd elemental associations illustrated differently than the usual Marseille patterns. Gold and silver paint on the cards, and they are so very pretty...this is most definitely an art deck, a deck for collectors, and for some at least, that's more or less what it is.

I have a rule though, about reading with all decks I own. If I cannot read with it, I do not keep it. And indeed, I've found a way - a very specific way - to get this deck to give me brilliant readings. I only ever read with it using the Comte de Mellet spread, no reversals. With this method, readings vary from short, with only one or two pairs of cards to read, to quite longer. In fact, after my scanning spree I was inspired to do a reading for myself with it...it ended up being six pairs, for a total of twelve cards, much more than my reading usual. As usual, utterly on point, accurate, and thorough. That reading is too long and too personal to post here, so instead I thought I would linger a bit on one aspect of this deck I find particularly charming - the courts!

It is of course an extra challenge to take the courts - often considered some of the trickiest cards in the deck to read - and show them as these masked, abstracted figures. Yes, what I love about these is just how well the 'feel' of each court is expressed. I love the knight of wands, for example, because he isn't quite the bold rushing forward figure of other decks...yet actually, expression not unlike that of the RWS really...uncertain, heading into unfamiliar territory perhaps, encountering some surprise, the ridicule of the horse...and yet he goes anyway. What's that saying about courage being about feeling fear and proceeding anyway? I like this queen too...majestic in the way she holds that cup, her hood over her like a canopy, the influence of intuition, mind...

I also quite like these two courts. The starkness of the coloring on the King of Swords really highlights the kind of harsh, unyielding intellectual nature of this figure, the width of his collar and garb how much space he takes up, his authority...everything black, white, red. Those shoulder masks... As for this page...the garb of a scholar, or at least it seems so to me, and the curious up-tilt of the head. She likes learning new things, this page, exploring, inspecting, enriching herself. Love the detail of the sprouting plant in the background.

But yes, love the quirky courts in this deck, and shall definitely be doing some exercises around them eventually, when I get back to working with this deck more regularly. It really is such a treasure: the majors are, too, quite awesome :]

thoughts on the marrakech

So I don't ordinarily comment at length/write up a whole post when switching between reading decks...but since the Marrakech isn't one of the easily available mass market decks that everyone and their ma has a copy of, and since i got it with specific reasons and expectations, I though I'd have a go at it in this case.

This is another one of those instances where I pick cards I feel are appropriate rather than pull them and interpret... See, I think what this deck does with the Fool is rather interesting. There are two fool cards in the deck...both have a reinterpretation of the classic symbolism, the man on a journey (though interesting that he isn't a youth!), scorpions and snakes at his feet instead of a dog, a hyena lurking in the background...danger, danger but also that sun and the rainbow, hope, optimism, opportunity awaiting. In one card, he is entering a veil, in the other leaving it...the beginning and end of some kind of journey, then? Running towards vs. from something? Seeing clearly ahead vs behind? Many ways to interpret this. My mind goes to the symbolism of oroboros again - all beginnings have an end, all ends are in their own way a new beginning.

I also like this take on the wheel. I looked up the meaning of Mektoub, and essentially it is the idea of fate, predestination, so it is written, so it will be. But yes, it fits here, the idea that larger wheels spin, things always moving and changing and sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse and you roll with it. I like the utter ridiculousness of the imagery - that sometimes things just happen and sometimes they are and you cannot explain it, cannot make logical sense of the why, why is this happening to me, it just IS this is where you ARE right now. But it's all on the back of an elephant, who moves forward, change, motion, always.

Yes, it's an interesting deck, especially the majors. Those I very much like, and there is a lot of food for thought even though they aren't very busy. The use of primary colors by and large is striking. Love the North African influence of the art. The courts...I don't quite know how I feel about those. The deck plays around with ethnicities (arabs, asians, indian, white) but there doesn't seem to fully by a rhyme or reason to it (as in, it doesn't go by the suits) and...yeah. The minors are not very illustrated or expressive...less approachable than even regular marseilles minors I'd say. I can see them giving people used to reading with illustrated minor decks trouble for sure. Actually, though, I must say I was pleasantly surprised at how well I was able to read them. Apparently my style for such is a mish-mash of relating to majors and number meanings and suit meanings and traditional rws meanings and marseille tradition meanings all wrapped together depending on context and accompanying cards and it...works for me, and makes me realize just how much I've progressed as a reader in the last few years.

So yeah, interesting deck. I like it, but I do admit its more an intellectual like than that kind of gut reaction, instinctive/intuitive type like. Will definitely work with it some more in the future. For now, going to continue with Thoth, whose awesomeness I am realizing more and more, and also, I think, with the Fey, another pretty recent acquisition of mine :]

My most favorite Deck!

So...whether you are a tarot collector/enthusiast/reader with 2 decks, or 20, or 200, when it comes down to it, everyone has to have a favorite deck, right? The one that calls to you just a bit more than the rest; the one that gives you the really great readings; the one whose art just utterly enchants. For me, that deck, the most favorite of favorites, the one that I did indeed grab before anything else when firefighters broke down my door due to a fire in another apartment on my floor a few months ago is... Tarot Nusantara!

Not everyone has heard of it. It is, sadly, not so easy to get ahold of, and certainly not published by any of the major US or European publishers of tarot decks.

It's a pretty straightforward RWS clone designed and published in Indonesia and not so easy to get outside of Indonesia. I was lucky enough to find a fellow Aeclectic member from Singapore who was willing to sell me a copy. It was, at the time, the most I'd paid for a tarot deck, and to me at least, worth every penny.

I simply ADORE this deck. I've never been a huge fan of the standard old RWS. It's growing on me, I admit. Planning on getting a Pamela Coleman Smith Commemorative deck eventually, and also hopefully the Hoi Polloi but...for a long time I didn't like it at all, didn't connect with the images, just found it...boring, compared to so many other decks out there...

This clone, though? I really cannot express how deeply it appeals to me. The Indonesian art? The colors? The textures of the clothes? The awesome backgrounds? The way it reworks each RWS image in the new style but keeps them properly recognizable, takes out all the Christian symbolism which, while I intellectually get the importance of, intuitiveness has always been a turn of?

There is just so much for me to love about this deck.

I love the size of it. It's more or less playing card size; a bit bigger. Actually a bit bigger than the Silicon Dawn, so really not that small. For me, ideal-size. I'm of the camp that prefers smaller decks that are easy to handle than larger decks that are 'easier to see' but unwieldy...

Not that it is ALL quite...ideal. I wouldn't quite complain about the card stock. It feels really nice in the hands, and shuffles well. Certainly preferable to the super stiff lamination of some USG decks...

However, it is, I would say...delicate. The fronts are thinly laminated...the laminate actually has a really interesting/nice texture. But the backs are un-laminated. Which is a bit...concerning, shall we say. A spill on this deck would be a disaster. Creases easier-than-average to obtain. I've been careful as can be but...I like to carry around whatever deck I'm currently working with in my bag most of the time, because hey, you never know, but this does make me nervous.

But yeah. It's quite easy to read, being a RWS clone and all, and I'd imagine quite easy to learn with - by the time I got it I was well beyond that initial learning the meanings of cards phases, but yanno.

It also came with a nice book, of which I can understand none because it is all in Bahasa Indonesia, lol. Nice novelty item, though.

The titles on majors and courts are also in Bahasa Indonesia, which is a definite plus for me because, language-obsessed thing that I am, I just love it when my decks have TITLES IN FOREIGN LANGUAGES, and especially LANGUAGES I DO NOT UNDERSTAND.

So yeah. This is hands down most treasured deck in my collection. It makes me sad that it is so hard to get because uh, I think it totally should be widely available for all!

That would also make it easier for me to procure a much-desired second copy, lol. I live in fear of the insanity that would ensue if anything happened to the one I have :D