Monday, February 27, 2012

Meeting Tarot of the Master...

So for reasons that do not have to do with aesthetic appeal or readability (i like it fine on both counts) I'm just not feeling working with the Fey right now. Maybe it has to do with it feeling too 'light' compared to the Thoth that has so enchanted me. Perhaps it's just more whimsical than I'm feeling right now. Dunno, but going to put it away and give in another shot at some point in the future and see how I feel about it then.

For now, I've decided that alongside dear Thoth I'm going to try working with my trimmed LoS Tarot of the Master. A bit of a challenge, this will be. Going to work with it purely intuitively, since I've gotten rid of the keyword borders and so don't believe in those nonsense LWBs...

These cards are an interesting pair to draw up tonight. I see myself a lot in this hermit right now, seeing as I am in exactly this position, alone in my little corner of the world surrounded by books, papers, trying to get work accomplished, something I must do. The youth in the two of wands holds two staffs, which reminds me of both choices and opportunities, the idea of opportunity cost in economics: for everything you choose to do, time you invest, effort, there is something else you could be doing with those resources that you are giving up. Sometimes you can gain most by being the hermit, alone with his books and lantern, and other times you need to step away from that hermit role, reach out to other people, get up and explore the world.

Sometimes you need to be the Hermit, but your mind keeps thinking of other things it could be doing. Distraction, distraction, so easy in this age of multi-tasking, a zillion tabs and windows open in front of us on the computer screen: sometimes we can have it all, but sometimes not. Which path, which doorway will we choose to invest ourselves in this time? Sometimes the path of the Hermit requires so much of us, and seems so hard: wouldn't it be easier to just call it quits? To say I give, I give, this path of study was more than I could handle, enough for now? But of course, the path that is most difficult is often the most rewarding as well - the torches of victory for those who stick to it; doors to better things, perhaps. And recognition, no? The deck creator's name on the plaque behind the boy - who will recognize the Hermit's efforts? Who will pat him on the back? How much of what we do is about appearances - wanting to be seen as competent, or not wanting to be seen as the person who failed, gave up?

Always with the choices, the options, the distractions, the pull of this and that. In an ideal world perhaps the Hermit could just be the Hermit, alone with a book in nature, learning only for the sake of learning, reading for the love of knowledge and the written word. And an aspect of that is still there, always, but also more - consequences and possibilities circling around, always, doors swinging open and shut.


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